Narendra Modi a.k.a Namo vows to fight for ‘The Hindus’ (not the community, Wendy’s book)
In a fit of secularism, Narendra Modi has decided to gift copies of Wendy Doniger’s The Hindus: An Alternative History free of cost to colleges and universities in the country. ‘Let us be open-minded and show tolerance, something that I have always strongly believed in,’ his press office said in a statement.
The move seems to be designed to appeal to the YA vote bank. Youngsters, however, seem to be skeptical. ‘Why would we read a heavy, academic book which we had never even heard of before the controversy? We only read about Hinduism when it is written in a snappy, user-friendly manner, like Amish Tripathi’s chillum-smoking, romantic Shiva!’
Dr.Doniger and her publisher have publicly expressed their gratitude – some say, because they have no choice. ‘But this is obviously a plot. If the book is freely available, nobody will want to buy it, ’ said a disgruntled insider.
Rahul Gandhi releases excerpts from his autobiography
We have recently been informed that Rahul Gandhi is hard at work on his autobiography. Excerpts:
“Our party has empowered people in the freedom movement, farmers in the green revolution, and each & every citizen in the telecom scam… er… I mean the telecom revolution.”
“I am deeply concerned about the state of farmers in India. In order to learn about their problems, I have started playing Farmville and am getting quite good at it.”
“My family is full of empowered women. Now they just have to find a way to empower me.”
Chetan Bhagat nominated for the Booker Prize… finally
Indians all over the world were overjoyed to hear the Booker Prize Committee’s early announcement last night about Chetan Bhagat’s nomination for the Man Booker prize 2014.
“We are tired of giving the prize to nuanced, literary works which then go on to top bestseller lists, only to gather dust on people’s bookshelves. For once, we want to give the prize to book that does not make our grey cells sweat. Also, reading about India’s youth and the terrible troubles they go through in their love lives, was eye-opening to us all.”, said a source from the committee.
The committee were tight-lipped as to whether they were hoping for some reflected glory from Mr. Bhagat’s book, which is arguably much more popular than all previous Booker Prize winners put together.
“I Quit,” Says George R.R. Martin
Yesterday, George R.R. Martin, creator of the Song of Ice and Fire series, announced that he is retiring from writing and will not release any more books. This makes A Dance With Dragons: After the Feast the last book in the series.
“It’s the fans,” Martin sighs. The fever pitch excitement for new installments, while flattering from afar, turns quite harrowing at close quarters. Martin tells Graham how his blog comments are always filled with people demanding the new books. “I am not even allowed to watch football anymore,” he wails, noting how fans scold him for spending even miniscule amounts of time away from writing. “Earlier I used to take revenge on the fans by killing off major characters every time they asked me when the next book would be out, but now even that doesn’t soothe me.”
– with contributions from Janani Harihara, Neha Yadav, Pratibha Jain and Vanathi Parthasarathy